How to talk to a guy part 1!

 How to talk to a guy part 1

Being 39,5 and still single after my last relationship ended 7 years ago it's time for

me to start learning how to talk to a guy. You might think: eh? How is it possible that

at age 39,5! you still haven’t find a way how to talk to a guy?

Well let me explain it to you then. Up and till so far i always been using online

dating to be able to talk to guys. My self esteem was and still is,

quite bad and i was thinking no one would ever like me for who i am

and the problems im facing due to the disability that i have. 

Their for i kinda shut myself down from whats happening outside and

i stay inside a lot. 

Depression keeping me stuck

The passed 3 years i was in a major depression so i did not had any space to meet

guys to build something. I was hiding in an online game called world of warcraft so

i didnt have to face reality to much. But hiding in a game does not give you the 

opportunity to meet new people in real life. 

When i finally got sick of gaming i realized i had no idea how to meet new people!

When i first talked to a friend about it i saw how big my problem really was. How am

i ever going to find the right person for me if i keep hiding inside? 

Go outside and talk to people!

So, go outside and talk to people you would think, right? But that's not an easy choice

for me to do. As i suffer from an unknown disability 22q11ds i have a low self esteem.

I'm also dealing with anxiety and depressions a lot. When i have a good day i feel that

i can deal with the whole world and i want to do everything, but when i have a bad day

i can't do anything and i just lay on bed sleeping.

So i need to try to plan everything on days i am high on energy.  

Back to topic how to talk to a guy

So, when a guy would look at me usually i don't know how to respond on that.

For instance i am doing grocerys and a guy is looking at me and i'm like: 

what do you want? So when this is repeatedly happening i keep thinking: 

how to move forward to the  next step? So one day i decided to say ‘Hi’. 

And now we are stuck of saying hi for  the last 3 months. 

Do i need to do something with this? I do not know. I don't want to end up feeling

awkward around this guy every time i meet him. I picture myself chasing him 

with eggs if things would go wrong after i decide to take it to a next level. 

Practice makes perfect!

So for this summer my goal is going to be to pay more attention about whats

happening around me. I'm not gonna go outside and be like: ‘i don't know whats

happening i just close my eyes and do my thing.’ The next step would be 

noticing when someone is checking me out and start smiling.

From their i hope to move forward to someday pass beyoned saying

just hi to someone and actually get a conversation started!